Eigenmatrix.org

I’ve recently found a bunch of crank call mp3’s from the infamous www.mucker.co.uk website that was once out there. Having looked around, it also seems that some folks call them the Paisley Tapes.

** Listen to these with the kids out of earshot as they have pretty choice language **

Blaspheme - Complaint to BBC about ‘Australian soap opera’

Boxing - Call to Boxing Gym

Car Hire - Caller wants to fit 14 people in a hire car

Cat Home - Research lab doctor looking for test subjects

Chauffeur - Tries to book a taxi from a chauffeur company

Guest House - Asian man seeks guest house in Paisley for his family

Home - Man wants rid of his mum into a nursing home

Internet - Call to Internet service provider to buy ‘an internet’

Jaffa - 1471 callback wind up

Pet Shop - Man wants advice from pet shop

Pitta Pockets - Complaint about dodgy carry out

Pizzas - Caller wants ‘barely edible’ pizzas

Scrappy - Short scrapyard call about fuel pump

Snudge - Another scrapyard call this time about a new bonnet

Stutter - Man with bad stutter

Taxi - Complaint to Taxi company about farting driver

Video - Call to record shop to return a video that’s been watched

Thinking of travelling to Glasgow soon ? You need the Glasgow Survival Guide for a proper Ned-ucation !